Thursday, October 31, 2013

Homework, Homework, and Homework

Over the years this writer has enjoyed providing addiction education, life skills and mentoring to kids and adults of all ages. The last few years I have found myself doing something that I never learned to do as a kid, homework. This last month of October 2013, I have been fortunate to work every day, Monday through Sunday, helping my clients, families, and other referrals that are sent my way. If I were to try and find the common thread this last month with all of my clients, some in school, others trying to go back to school, or clients who have kids that are in school what is the theme? Homework is the correct answer. Each week I will find myself helping kids, college kids, and adults with kids working on their homework. My brain back in the day did not pay attention to the algebra, chemistry, biology, world literature, english, and history. I am finding that my higher power, and God are providing me this challenge or make up for not paying attention in class when I was a kid! Parents, if there is one thing that I can share with you with this story it would be to get engaged in your child's academic career. Make it a fun experience when you are helping with the homework! You will find that your patience, and commitment to your kids studies will help you build a healthy interpersonal relationship with your son or daughter. Taking that extra time to listen and learn with your child will help each of you stay in the moment. I am finding that kids and parents who are struggling with addiction, can learn to communicate with each other while doing their homework. The communication building and listening skills seem to help diminish the disrespect and past negative behavior. Homework can be a gateway to a positive transformation between the kid and adult. Schedule a time when you can check in with your kid, and support their academic futures. Collaborate together, and learn new communication skills as you both learn about each other in challenging times. Stay in your health, stay in the moment.

Saturday, October 19, 2013

Recovery Awareness

Do you remember back in your past when you were aware of all the different places and people you could get high with, gamble, purge, and have unhealthy sexual experiences? It's safe to say that your awareness was in touch with your addiction. Self was not in control of your thoughts, hence, you knew how to keep the addiction spiral going. Now, fast forward to right now, this second. You are in control of your thoughts, and you are becoming aware of what places, and people who are safe for you, right? This is called recovery awareness. Controlling your thoughts, becoming aware of your surroundings allows self to be in your health and in the moment. You are aware of the red flag behavior and are choosing not to engage in that unhealthy life style. Recovery awareness is a thought that transitions into a healthy behavior that only self can control! You know you can use, gamble, purge, and have unhealthy sexual behavior, but, you are choosing not to. If feels great being able to implement recovery awareness in your life. The risk versus reward thinking diminishes. Self begins to slow down their impulsive thoughts and think things through when they use recovery awareness. You begin to develop healthy recovery skills that help keep you balanced when you are in a risk situation. These new recovery skills include daily journaling, exercising, eating healthy, and finding a support group or a support team for you to engage in. Going back to school may be a healthy skill that you are working on to improve your education. It feels positive when self can identify with their own recovery awareness routine. You may share your skills with other addicts who need the extra support to help them navigate a recovery awareness path. A new confidence is being built in your body, and you are the builder! Stay in your health, stay in the moment.

Friday, October 18, 2013

Language, language, and language

The other day, I was working with some kids who were how shall we say have a mouth on them. The child's therapist came up to me and asked how do I handle that vulgar language. I looked at her, and responded, sometimes helpers need to talk their language, but at the same time teach them new language. She looked at me with a curious smile. I was waiting for her to ask another question, then one of the kids began on a f-bomb tyrant with another peer. I walked over, and asked the boys to lower the voices, but more importantly choose the correct word. Little did I know the staff psychiatrist was right behind me with the child's therapist. My client came up to me, apologized for the f-bombs, then told the other peers to chill out, and will see them next group. My client went to get a drink, we were doing our session right after the group. The child's therapist came up to me and responds, how did you do that? I looked at her, and said, I speak their language. It is one thing to say f-bomb, but another to let them know you understand what they mean, but can hollar it out in another way. I call it respect. I curse too, and need to work on it. The key is being able to relate to a kids language, regardless of how it may come out. You can teach kids how to choose other words. Control the thought, positive behavior follows. I have found that most kids, who suffer from behavior problems, curse because they are angry, or think the language is cool. If you work on the anger, and then understand the slang, the cursing begins to diminish. There are many layers of inappropriate language being called out by kids who think they can get respect by this type of behavior. If you are a helper and could use some new communication techniques with your clients or patients, try speaking their language. Once you are able to identify the thought behind the clients word, you can begin to implement transformation in a healthy way for your client. Stay in your health, stay in the moment.

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Trapped in your own body- can be a positive thing!

One of the common thoughts that I hear weekly in working with clients who struggle with eating disorders, "I feel trapped in my body". This writer believes that the person really does feel this way, however, why not turn the trapped feeling into a positive feeling? Persons with eating disorders can have a difficult time accepting their body. In order to find that acceptance, it is important for the person who once purged to understand and identify what they feel is wrong with their body at this second. Not what was wrong with their body in the past, but right now. Learning to be honest with one's feelings is a huge step in understanding why a person who has a eating disorder chooses to purge, and continue the cycle of the eating disorder. Once the honesty can be put forth, the feeling of trapped in your body begins to unravel. You can start to change the negative feelings and thoughts that you may have with your own body to positive thoughts when you become honest on where your behavior is right now. Find the positives about your body. Yes, I have heard all the negatives in my many years of helping people who struggle with this disorder, but, each negative thought self has the power to transform into a positive. Accept you may have challenges with your body, but they are not a reason to purge, and continue the cycle of not eating, counting your food in a negative way, binge eating, and not eating at all. Treat your body as something that only you can change, and appreciate the unique shapes, color, and beauty it has. Try this exercise if you need some more support in accepting your body right now as you read this addiction education blog. Go to the mirror every morning as you wake up and start your day. Look into the mirror and pick out three things you like in what you see. Reflect, be honest, but it has to be three positive things. Then pick three challenges in what you see at this moment with your body. Now write down the positives and challenges down in your journal. Pick one positive and one challenge for that day. Your goal is to to keep the positive a positive for that whole day, and for the challenge you need to switch that into a positive before the end of day. Use your mind, control the thought. You can change that feeling of being trapped into being trapped in a positive way. Stop comparing your body to others, and your peers. You have one body, and one brain, balance them for self. Each day you make your list, you become stronger in your thoughts, and learn how to accept where you are at that day in a healthy way. You know you can purge, but you choose not to. Stay in your health, stay in the moment.