Instead of buying things talk about things..

Good morning from snowy Minnesota. I wanted to blog about this story a few weeks ago. Permission to share. Our client's mother got this call from her son. He was struggling at college, as many college kids do. I work with his younger sister. The son who is a junior in college, was having an epic meltdown. In the past, his mother always, (according to his sister-who I work with) would drop everything and try to make things right for hm. This behavior I see constantly with parents. In this case, the mom was trying to do her best and fix that problem, right? How many times do parents want to this with their child? Well, this fix was different. Instead, this mom decided she would listen to me, and invest communication over money. She was not saying that she would not help her son financially, but wanted to talk with him. The meltdown was not over financial stuff, but a meltdown with his current girlfriend. In the past, his mother would coddle him, try and buy him things that would help him get into a better place. Parents, I see this behavior daily. Parents want to fix their kids with unnecessary purchases. However, this is not the best option. College kids need a safe place to vent, and want their parents to listen to them. Everyone enjoys a nice dinner, or some new clothes, but does that fix the problem for the college student? No it does not. All it does is reinforce buying things that do not hit the root of the problem. I understand that some families are financially set and can afford to do some of these impulsive purchases, but does it really work? In my opinion no. Why not work through the negative energy with a positive talk? This mom, did exactly what we talked about. She called him back after talking to this writer. She listened to her son vent. She did not go rush to get him (like she has done in the past) but stayed calm. Her husband came home, and they all skyped with their son that night. The next piece of this story is key. The college kid son reached out to his sister that night. They had the best talk I am told. Not one penny was spent in trying to fix this problem. The college kid son patched things up with his girl friend and his mother shared that she felt empowered. Talk with your college kid first, then listen. Sometimes the best fix is just being there for your kid. Stay in your health, stay in the moment. Self-Balance-Higher Power-Fun